When I was going to my postpartum physical therapy, I was talking to my therapist about my return to work. (Quick side note to say that I LOVED PP PT [hehe, see what I did there?] so much and think everyone who has a baby should do it.) I was telling her about how hard it was to go back to work, because I love my baby, but that I also love my job. And it was just hard.
"Yeah, that mommy guilt will get you," she responded.
Others have said similar things. This is also a phrase that gets thrown around wildly on the internet. I do not like it. And I am pushing back.
"Yeah, that mommy guilt will get you," she responded.
Others have said similar things. This is also a phrase that gets thrown around wildly on the internet. I do not like it. And I am pushing back.
Our friends at Merriam-Webster define guilt in a variety of ways, but the one that seems most suited to what is being discussed currently is "feelings of deserving blame especially for imagined offenses or from a sense of inadequacy".
We all certainly feel inadequate from time to time, mom or otherwise. And we all do things that are deserving of blame.
But for me, the work versus kid balance isn't about feeling like I deserve blame. Oh heck no. No, no, no. And it's not even about a sense of inadequacy.
It's about desire.
I LOVE being with my baby. And most of the time, I love my job too. To label that as guilt is mildly offensive, and plain wrong. Guilt involves a "should". There is no should-ing here. Just strong desires.
We all certainly feel inadequate from time to time, mom or otherwise. And we all do things that are deserving of blame.
But for me, the work versus kid balance isn't about feeling like I deserve blame. Oh heck no. No, no, no. And it's not even about a sense of inadequacy.
It's about desire.
I LOVE being with my baby. And most of the time, I love my job too. To label that as guilt is mildly offensive, and plain wrong. Guilt involves a "should". There is no should-ing here. Just strong desires.
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