[Post from November 2012]
[a very honest post]
Well, not exactly unemployed. I nannied for three days a week and sometimes taught up to three yoga classes every week. Friends bought or gave me almost all my food. I clamped down an iron fist on my earnings, paying only my rent and student loan bills every month. Oh. And gas.
I stressed out a lot, but I also read voraciously, laughed really hard, cried honestly, took photographs with a camera and with my mind, and last week, I even BIG cleaned my house. I applied for lots and lots of jobs, interviewed extensively, and learned that sometimes people who are interviewing you for a job actually don't really know how to interview someone. They asked me lists of questions that had little to do with the position in question, and seemed to be from an online how-to article. It was a good reminder that all of us are human, all of us can be prone to put off something important until the last minute, and all of us are still trying to figure things out. I hope we never stop.
The reason I am writing this post is because Monday, I start a full time job. I loved the organization, loved the interview, and got a good sense of the atmosphere of the company. Nonetheless, I am full of trepidation. I am an idealist at heart, and it's one thing to imagine and wonder and ponder; it's another thing to dive into a real job, with hours and wages and an office.
I am wholeheartedly grateful to be moving into a place where I can provide for others as I have been provided for; while working in a supportive place doing work I believe is meaningful and important.
Thanks to what I might refer to as my sojourn from the working world, I understand some important things though.
1. A job is a job. It neither completes nor defines me.
2. Anxieties and worries occur working or otherwise. Some jobs (and I've had one of these) directly increase our anxieties while decreasing our ability to cope with them. These are worth leaving. In other instances, we look for a place to pin our often nameless fears and worries. Jobs are convenient. So are family members and loved ones. It's good to be aware of this.
3. We live in a country with more than enough, that constantly tells us we need more. We don't. There is always enough.
These are some of the lessons I hope to take into my new job. I am hoping to give myself lots of patience and plenty of time to transition. It takes a long time to transition. I learned this in Spain, in coming back from Spain, and in starting other jobs.
Here we go - the beginning of an end and the beginning of a beginning.
[a very honest post]
Well, not exactly unemployed. I nannied for three days a week and sometimes taught up to three yoga classes every week. Friends bought or gave me almost all my food. I clamped down an iron fist on my earnings, paying only my rent and student loan bills every month. Oh. And gas.
I stressed out a lot, but I also read voraciously, laughed really hard, cried honestly, took photographs with a camera and with my mind, and last week, I even BIG cleaned my house. I applied for lots and lots of jobs, interviewed extensively, and learned that sometimes people who are interviewing you for a job actually don't really know how to interview someone. They asked me lists of questions that had little to do with the position in question, and seemed to be from an online how-to article. It was a good reminder that all of us are human, all of us can be prone to put off something important until the last minute, and all of us are still trying to figure things out. I hope we never stop.
The reason I am writing this post is because Monday, I start a full time job. I loved the organization, loved the interview, and got a good sense of the atmosphere of the company. Nonetheless, I am full of trepidation. I am an idealist at heart, and it's one thing to imagine and wonder and ponder; it's another thing to dive into a real job, with hours and wages and an office.
I am wholeheartedly grateful to be moving into a place where I can provide for others as I have been provided for; while working in a supportive place doing work I believe is meaningful and important.
Thanks to what I might refer to as my sojourn from the working world, I understand some important things though.
1. A job is a job. It neither completes nor defines me.
2. Anxieties and worries occur working or otherwise. Some jobs (and I've had one of these) directly increase our anxieties while decreasing our ability to cope with them. These are worth leaving. In other instances, we look for a place to pin our often nameless fears and worries. Jobs are convenient. So are family members and loved ones. It's good to be aware of this.
3. We live in a country with more than enough, that constantly tells us we need more. We don't. There is always enough.
These are some of the lessons I hope to take into my new job. I am hoping to give myself lots of patience and plenty of time to transition. It takes a long time to transition. I learned this in Spain, in coming back from Spain, and in starting other jobs.
Here we go - the beginning of an end and the beginning of a beginning.
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